Score: 10

"The One... The Only... The Classic..."

submission: A King Is Born

date: December 20, 2005

Still brings a tear to my eye to this day. This is what Christmas is about, fools. It's not about gifts and Home Alone on TV, it's not about eating a big fat dinner and getting drunk-as-a-skunk, It's not about the birth of Jesus Christ...

Don't you all see? Christmas is about me wearing a crown of some sort! Go celebrate me. Every single one of you.

Score: 10

"Man, Kozak's little bro can be such a dick!"

submission: Kozak VI: Drunken Days

date: September 11, 2005

Sometimes i wonder how Carrot can be able to walk out into the street without wearing a bag on his head, considering how fucked up his cousins are.

I congratulate him for being able to do so, and i congratulate you for salvaging this long lost footage.

Score: 3

"Another uneventful collaboration."

submission: Wonderwall

date: March 20, 2005

Once again, members of the 'ClockCrew' have put together a collaboration which tries to be incredibly artistic, but falls short. I'm starting to notice a common theme here with the other collaborations. Here we have yet another animation where clocks cry and pull guns on themselves. Great.

Still, there was some above par animation from TwigClock, who looks like he has great potential, or maybe thats just because the other pieces in this collaboration were incredibly poor. Either way, i'm keeping my eye on this guy.

The rest of you should try harder.

-CabbageClock

Score: 1

"Congratulations."

submission: Braindead2AM

date: March 9, 2005

Someone took a bit of advice and decided to drop the ridiculous routine of making flashes which consisted of a stationary computer with apalling text-to-speech dialogue. Kudos to you.

But unfortunately, this flash is a collection of random images and graphics tweening back and forth, in and out, and whichever way possible. It's random and makes no sense whatsoever, which can be incredibly funny if done correctly.
This however, is not.

White backgrounds with shape tweening curly lines are incredibly bad, especially for a 2.5mb download. I see better garbage than this every day with filesizes no bigger than 60k.
You REALLY need to compress your sound a lot better. Try reading the NG walkthrough on sound compression for a bit of guidance.

Better luck next time.

Score: 7

"The one to end them all..."

submission: GRANDFATHERCLOCK AWAKENS!

date: March 1, 2005

...or in this case, the one to begin the three part saga.

This little ditty has the triple A...thats right...the AAA

A is for Action
A is for Animation
A is for Acting

All three combined create this powerhouse opening installment to a trilogy that will blow your feeble mind.

Evil doers beware; Grandfather-Clock is in your rear view mirror...

...and he's gaining.

Score: 1

"What bilge is this?"

submission: Viewer Participation Ep.1

date: March 1, 2005

L33TCL0ck returns with another waste of everyone's precious time with 'Viewer Participation Ep. 1', possibly the slowest flash animation i have ever seen in my entire life.

The animation itself consists of two things...a computer in the middle of a screen and really slow text-to-speech dialogue. This changes halfway through to a computer and a turd in the middle of the screen and really slow text-to-speech dialogue.

The author substitutes any chance of including anything humourous with random profanity, which loses any comedic edge when spoken by a TTS program.

The main purpose of the animation is to get viewers to doctor an image with captions (with a provided link to the image itself) so that they can send it back to the author, for him to make another waste of time garbage pile of other peoples work, with a bit of extra 'computer in center of screen speaking really slow TTS dialogue' animation.

Avoid at all costs.

Score: 1

"HAHAH FUCK YOU RADISH!"

submission: Some Funny Pictures ep.2

date: February 25, 2005

That bit made me laugh.

But seriously, this flash was a bit...shit. Instead of sitting in the corner of the room, whilst sucking your thumb and crying your eyes out whenever RadishClock criticises your movies, do us all a favour and try taking note of what he is telling you. Please.

Score: 9

"Made me laugh, Made me cry, Made eat a poo poo pie"

submission: DIE KOALACLOCK!!!

date: February 24, 2005

This made me laugh so hard.

The voice acting was superb, and the spinning turn was the icing on the cake.

I've never really spoke to Koalaclock, but i now hate him because you hate him.

That is the effect of this hilarious little short.

Score: 7

"Dave, i'm going to be honest with you."

submission: fun stuff 914

date: February 20, 2005

It was a tad on the short side, and the majority of the stuff wasn't actually as fun as the name suggested (and i know from experience - a lot of my fun stuff's weren't as fun as the name suggested, either)

BUT! And it's a BIG BUT...

...THE BALD PRESIDENT GOT ARROWED IN THE FACE!

I'm telling you man...that made me laugh for like...5 seconds. Good stuff.

So.

Continuing fun stuff tradition = 10 points.
Arrowing president in the face = 50 points.
Fire = 5 points

65 Veggiepoints for you, sir.

Score: 5

"Yet another honest 'CabbageClock' Brand review"

submission: DailyToon SE: Mp3_Lock

date: February 6, 2005

After seeing the entries by Grandfather-Clock and Internet-Clock, i had little hope for this animation, but you put the clocks to shame.

It was fairly enjoyable. The graphics could have been better, but the animation was smooth and bouncy and the sound was good quality, and it wasn't too short either.

I wasn't expecting any sort of moral tale, so i had to laugh when i got one at the end.

Keep it up.